45: The Bones Under Bone Hill

This session played Monday, August 30th, 2010 at Waves on Broadway.


Bonspiel and his retainers Holmen and William Wortons.
Dalamyr and some guys he hired to watch his wagon.
Umgax Longshanks, his retainer Thena, his charmed Cleric companion Telmar, and his two dogs: Barf and Puke.
William Parsnip and his retainer Felix.


A mighty force of experienced adventurers travel to Bone Hill, where they destroy undead and magical guardians with impunity, and are rewarded for their valor with magic items and jools. Unfortunately, when they return to the surface, they find their retainers slain, horses scattered and goods stolen by filthy, no-good Bugbears.

Leaving Restenford Again

Um. Did something happen when we left town?

A Shadowy Figure and a Phantom Trap Door

I was buying a cookie when this happened.

Them Bones

Dalamyr the Wise uses holy might to blast skeletons and zombies from whence they came. Alas, the war dogs' faith is weak, and they flee (tails presumably between their legs).

The Room and Spectre (aka Bone Hill's Hotel California)

While Parsnip dodges yet another terrible fate with his usual aplomb and Holmen pays for his curiosity by being horribly cursed, a ghostly looking apparition with iron gauntlets and flame for breath grapples with and nearly kills Telmar before the combined might of Bonspiel, Dalamyr and Umgax force it to flee through a nearby door. The heroes call for Parsnip and pursue, but Telmar decides to call it a day. A fateful decision, as it turns out.


Eyefucker #1

Parsnip faces a small eye-tyrant in a narrow, collapsed passage, his companions unable to bring their arms to bear. Bonspiel blinds the creature with a light spell on its central eye, Umgax unleashes magical hell on it, and Parsnip cuts it in half. Beyond is a treasure vault.

Gelatinous Cube

And a gelatinous cube, guarding some of the treasure. Parsnip destroys it, but is paralyzed by its slime while looting the jelly.

Eyefucker #2

Another small beholder emerges from a really cool door with an eye on it, that the party thinks would look great in Parsnip's house and resolve to come back for. This time its up to Bonspiel and Umgax(?) to take it out, which they do with some difficulty.

Big Hairy Goblin

The party explores further, surprising a Bugbear on the other side of a portcullis. They ignore him, believing the room beyond to be a cell, and not a hallway.

Emerge Unto Slaughter

With the treasure secured, they return to the surface to find a massacre of their henchmen and horses. There is much wailing and gnashing of teeth before heading back to Restenford, looking for those who are not among the dead.


PCs got 825xp and 837gp, 9sp and 8cp. Retainers got 413xp and bupkis.
Some war dogs were scared off by undead. William Worton, Telmar, several horses and Bonspiel's mule were brutally murdered by Bugbears while they guarded the camp. Dalamyr's retainers probably died too. Holmen was cursed. Thena and Varghild are missing.

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