97: Black and Wight (Undead All Over)

Played

5 July 2012 at the grind.

Featuring:

The heroes:
Ranndy! (Randolph?)
Runty!
Holga!

Their faithful ogre companions:
Andrerio
Ondrar

Some nervous villagers:
Bjorn
Lommison
Lamiax
Borax

Summary

A domed mausoleum in the ruins of an ancient city is a shitty place. So it goes.

Some Stuff Happened

I wrote out a great summary. It was pithy and clever. It included everything important or interesting that happened but left out all the boring details and stupid conversations about Russian acronyms and dumb movies from the 70s and 80s. It took me half an hour to write up and when I went to click preview to make sure my links and formatting weren't broken I hit cancel instead. So you have to make do with a shitty summary instead.

Protip: Save your work in small increments. One or two paragraphs at a time, for example.

What about the plague cult?

The one from last time?? The one that took all of Ranndy's stuff? And Runty's arm and face? Dunno man, they left. That elf did too. Maybe they're in cahoots. Those dumb centaurs are still around, as is the ruined, cursed, defiled, ancient tower over which they keep vigil.

The vandalized vault

There were lewd borderline pornographic mosaics of cavorting demons which had been vandalized and then further obscured with crude borderline pornographic graffiti. There was a dumb arrow trap which might have been used to stop the mentally infirm from entering the mausoleum.

Wights are white

And ogres are human coloured. Until they have their life drained from them by a wight. Andrerio is killed and we have to dismantle his body before he can rise again as an ogre-wight.

Village shenanigans

Who doesn't think it would be a great idea to charm the mayor, polymorph him into an ogre and bring him into the dungeon with us? Johnstone apparently.

(Who thinks that the mayor of a village, even a shitty village, in a land where THE WIND ITSELF CAUSES MADNESS would like, totally walk around all alone save for some strange "adventurers" as if they were trustworthy? Graham apparently.)

Ssskkeelllllleetttooooons

There's a lot of skeletons in some rooms. They're all coming down a narrow hallway two at a time to be smashed to bits one after another. It is neither quick nor easy. There are fond memories and reminiscences about clerics and turning undead.

Iron Maiden(s with snake tails instead of legs)

Some statues come to life, surprising nobody. Holga kills one of them with lightning. Ondrar is polymorphed into a gelatinous cube which the other snake lady passes through without batting an eye. Ondrar is polymorphed into a rust monster while the snake lady is still passing through and immediately explodes apart. In his dying moment he rusts her enough that she can be dispatched by magic sword.

Everyone is tired and there are bits of gelatinous rust ogre cube monster all over everything so we call it a night

Total Losses/Loot

Andrerio (drained by wights)
Ondrar (obliterated in a polymorph mishap)
Alamia (found a trap)
Borax (breach of contract)

78gp in assorted coins
a wand of magic detection
potion of extra healing

This line is important for posterity: All PCs received 186 xp and 26 gp.

DM was johnstone.

Prev: plague-cult-debacle

Next: Daring Adventures of the Delicious Dandy

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